This episode is both a book recommendation and personal application of the first C of the 8 C’s of self-leadership: Clarity. Emily P. Freeman’s recent book How to Walk into a Room: The Art of Knowing When to Stay and When to Walk Away is both the book recommendation and the resource I’ve applied to my life this summer to gain Clarity; the first C of self-leadership according to the IFS Foundations tool I shared last episode. Such a great book!
As a reminder, here is the list of 8 C’s of Self-leadership and the link to their tool:
- Clarity
- Curiosity
- Courage
- Creativity
- Compassion
- Confidence
- Calmness
- Connectedness
Emily has given us both tools for our growth and shared her story in a tender and authentic way. She structured the book in three sections held within the metaphor of rooms and hallways.
In this episode I share how reading and applying her tools has been transformational for me. That is not hyperbole. I was able to name and grieve some losses through interacting with her words and tools in section 1 titled On Leaving: How to walk out of a room. In section 2 On Pausing: Discernment in Hallways Emily identifies how she is defining the idea of hallway and what its purpose is as we seek clarity in discernment. This section was pivotal in my personal work this summer. I leaned into my practices of meeting with a counselor, a spiritual director and trauma coach. I did a lot of journaling to identify the narratives that no longer serve me in this season and practiced leaning into our kind Companion, Holy Spirit. In the third and final section of the book title On Entering: How to Walk into a Room I saw myself as a leader, listener and how I am becoming a better friend to myself through it all.
I encourage you to get a copy of this book. I know it is a helpful resource in your journey of self-leadership. Why does this matter? When we learn to lead ourselves well, we can lead others with kindness and the 8 C’s of self-leadership intact.
You might consider working through this book with a companion whether that is a good friend or a counselor or coach. There is a lot of helpful healing that can come from interacting with Emily’s words. I’d love to be a coach to you or a small group of friends through this work.
Reach out to me either on my coaching website or on my Substack at Learning Along the Way
